What Did I Get Out Of It....???

A little favor, five rupees of balance,
For a cause never mine!
What did I get out of it?

Skipping a meal, bunking for a lunch,
A furious mom,
Risking your identity, and your equanimity,
To have a frowning brother,
For a cause never mine!
What did I get out of it?

Two hundred bucks, an unforgiving cop,
Two months of uncertainty on wheels,
Because of a cause never mine!
What did I get out of it?

Half an hour on the phone,
For merely an hour of bliss,
Deeper into the mud,
For a cause now mine!
What did I get out of it?

Awake through the night,
For just tem minutes of ecstasy,
They never came,
A depressed yet hopeful heart,
Now trying to get something out!

Spoiling the annual carnival,
Misallocation of space,
A performance next to nothing,
To get something out of nothing!

Hours at networking,
Working in an alien terrain,
Bluffing the handful constants,
Discussing the cause not mine!
What did I get out of it?

Supposed to be my life! Compromising with it,
For a constant to be, now changing the course,
For the cause is now achieved,
By me but not for my self!
What did I get out of it?

A ton of currency,
Consoling through the night!
Ignoring a cause that’s mine!
Ignoring the cause that’s mine,
And achieving the cause never meant to be mine!
What did I get out of it?

The answer is hard to find!
Apart from a friend’s smile,
Momentary overwhelmed ness,
And a pretentious behavior to my own self!

Is this what I wanted?
Six months of anxiety all at a stretch!
Given a status for a daily compromise with it!
Curtailment of instincts for being mislead,
Bearing the blows,
For a cause and people now both not mine!
Did I get something?

I became a table, and mediated the cause,
Even became a thorn in the flesh!
Was it innocence that didn’t let me see the inevitable?
Or realize the unimaginable!
But I did all that, or something made me do it?
Nevertheless what did I get out of it?

Was this a rehearsal of selflessness?
Has to be it!
In crude terms, I was will fully exploited!
Was I trying to buy someone in repercussion?
I don’t know!

But it’s sometimes better,
To curtail those features of your blood,
For their serene restoration in future!

I guess that illusionary contentment,
That I believed I had,
Wasn’t good enough to last my recovery,
But what I gained out of the misadventure,
Was an Adventure!
And I am sunk and flummoxed again!