Oops! I've let it slip,
Once again, irretrievable now,
I wish the hands moved anti-clockwise,
Even that may go a begging!
And I woke up late!
To what others had graduated in,
Amateur, took time to get seasoned,
Copy-paste in another level,
I wasn’t informed!
But even when I was,
I care not, to seal the deal,
Till a last moment sprint!
I knew my preferences,
A rush of blood lasting a month,
Focus shifts to the tributaries,
And lost is the main course.
Tilted towards the makeshifts,
I ignored the handful constants,
To convert one to the latter,
Absconded! A washer man’s dog!
Knew I needed to stem,
Confinements need my taste-buds,
My build similars a fluctuating graph!
My feathery self flows with the wind.
I realize this redundancy,
And the unacceptable “why”,
Exactly this punctuates my mismanaged tale!
“I know but I act not”
Each morn I vow against the same,
Failure replicates the morn at night,
Exactly this, highlight of my mismanaged tale!
“My plans are fenced in the dream”
The earthly stay I’ve spent this way,
“Postponement” of “feathers” “in the wave”
And if the wheels don’t follow my forward trail,
A careless me is the only one to blame!
Friday, October 30, 2009
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Still Single!
Life is about a score old now,
Transforming from tenderness to maturity,
They come; they go, like quarterly seasons,
Shift, unpack, and start again from the scratch.
Mental turbulences soaring high,
A fake display of peace to the outside,
Glaring emptiness, lacking the balance,
Missing if any constant,
And then it reads “Still Single”!
The sort of state no less than a bane,
My ends they meet but still I crave,
That satisfying touch seems miles away.
It hurts (Ouch)..!!
To see them go around,
Inferiority complex gets the better of me,
A shadow I need,
An accomplice in the dark,
A home for secrets and treasures,
Whose hug would feel like a heavenly embrace
A delightful unison without half measures.
Dare not think that I didn’t try!
I was dumb and innocent,
A complete makeover! Obsolete no more,
Appearance, conveyance, attitude, career!
I scrapped it all,
And peeped from wall to wall,
But the image that was so hard to mend,
Stayed to had a mixed effect.
What else do I do?
When the remains of my old self are extinct!
My actions have no effect,
Or things don’t fall in place!
Do I understand their point of view?
To improvise or find a match,
I guess I don’t!
Insults are more than cures to this injury!
This may be one of the gleaming many.
Maybe my instabilities are a little too much,
Or they just don’t know me!
Do I need to reach out more?
The end of this transformation
May end this drought too,
And till that time it would read “Still Single”!
Transforming from tenderness to maturity,
They come; they go, like quarterly seasons,
Shift, unpack, and start again from the scratch.
Mental turbulences soaring high,
A fake display of peace to the outside,
Glaring emptiness, lacking the balance,
Missing if any constant,
And then it reads “Still Single”!
The sort of state no less than a bane,
My ends they meet but still I crave,
That satisfying touch seems miles away.
It hurts (Ouch)..!!
To see them go around,
Inferiority complex gets the better of me,
A shadow I need,
An accomplice in the dark,
A home for secrets and treasures,
Whose hug would feel like a heavenly embrace
A delightful unison without half measures.
Dare not think that I didn’t try!
I was dumb and innocent,
A complete makeover! Obsolete no more,
Appearance, conveyance, attitude, career!
I scrapped it all,
And peeped from wall to wall,
But the image that was so hard to mend,
Stayed to had a mixed effect.
What else do I do?
When the remains of my old self are extinct!
My actions have no effect,
Or things don’t fall in place!
Do I understand their point of view?
To improvise or find a match,
I guess I don’t!
Insults are more than cures to this injury!
This may be one of the gleaming many.
Maybe my instabilities are a little too much,
Or they just don’t know me!
Do I need to reach out more?
The end of this transformation
May end this drought too,
And till that time it would read “Still Single”!
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Innocence
It sucks when you can’t say a simple “No”,
Path of truth you can’t let go,
Telling everyone before meeting that someone,
Or just diverting from where you intended to go,
Unintentionally everything comes out in a flow.
A job which was never mine,
My graciousness got the better of me,
Tried to escape but the cop didn’t spare,
A hundred bucks with all despair
They take me for granted,
I spend in both ways,
Just to get misunderstood,
Betrayed and fooled!
Simple things but they make me break,
And expose my haunting weakness.
Like an open balance sheet,
Prone to embezzlement
Helpless! Yes I try to resist the real,
What else? Should I be a public property?
No! I have the phobia,
Of being used disproportionately.
Should I be blamed?
Or the opportunist world,
For not letting a chance go by,
Being stepped on whenever they need!
A door without a hinge!
My empathy has a wasting effect.
Well that’s the price I pay!
For giving a thought to other’s distress.
The human race doesn’t deserve my care,
But at the end of it all,
My innocence has no eyes!
Path of truth you can’t let go,
Telling everyone before meeting that someone,
Or just diverting from where you intended to go,
Unintentionally everything comes out in a flow.
A job which was never mine,
My graciousness got the better of me,
Tried to escape but the cop didn’t spare,
A hundred bucks with all despair
They take me for granted,
I spend in both ways,
Just to get misunderstood,
Betrayed and fooled!
Simple things but they make me break,
And expose my haunting weakness.
Like an open balance sheet,
Prone to embezzlement
Helpless! Yes I try to resist the real,
What else? Should I be a public property?
No! I have the phobia,
Of being used disproportionately.
Should I be blamed?
Or the opportunist world,
For not letting a chance go by,
Being stepped on whenever they need!
A door without a hinge!
My empathy has a wasting effect.
Well that’s the price I pay!
For giving a thought to other’s distress.
The human race doesn’t deserve my care,
But at the end of it all,
My innocence has no eyes!
An Audacious Human
Someone usually in black and white,
Was thrown off a train, a century ago.
Alien he was to such behavior, agitated he was.
While they were white, black he was.
With anger and disgust he raised his voice,
Not for vengeance but for the masses’ plight.
Determined he was to get equal status
For all, and destroy the racial apparatus.
Such triumph overseas exhibited his fortius.
Back in his motherland were the celebrations of this hero.
Raised expectations meant his onslaught on the colonial rule.
Being his own predicament no outlandish ruth,
Equipped he was with the weapons of righteousness and truth.
His patriotic speeches stirred the souls of Indians alive,
Feelings of nationalism in his words did thrive.
A heap of misdirected mob was India till now,
His leadership made this nation unite and take a vow.
He made them believe that Freedom could be near,
On their path they needed to choose the right gear.
A ray of light, a glimmer of hope was seen by the Indians,
His disobeyers were sent to social dungeons.
The 1st assault, Non-Cooperation crippled the British entity.
Unfortunately a few violent idiots spoiled the party.
But the man stuck to his principles of ethics and morality,
Even after a withdrawal there was no apathy.
He violated the law with no trepidation,
Dandi march and salt was made,
Reason he gave for his own captivation,
Civil disobedience was now inscription on jade.
For natives who took such gallant blows
But were never diverted from what had to be done,
One wrong step the Irwin pact left all undone.
But alarmed were the British by the national unity,
And that man who by now had become a prodigy.
A mellowing encounter, the divide and rule policy.
The struggle continued to the last go, Quit India.
Panicky government imprisons him to avoid insomnia.
Without him who showed them the way,
Unruly followers got violent in disarray.
Communalist Violence turned the country gray.
A depressed man lets the mission go to fray.
But his efforts by now had done enough,
For India had become a volcano ready to cough.
It took five years to achieve liberty, though
Selfish interests had divided his heart,
India and Pakistan were the two parts.
Father of the nation, greatest man to walk the arena,
None alive could match his persona.
Clad in a yard of cloth he changed the rules,
Unlike here he had little respect from the western fools.
For the great Nobel Prize didn’t have him in fate.
The sublime human had the most unfortunate end,
A maniac with three shots and he made his last bend.
Sixty one years now since the end of an epic of bravery,
Its worthless to say but he was “Mahatma Gandhi”.
Was thrown off a train, a century ago.
Alien he was to such behavior, agitated he was.
While they were white, black he was.
With anger and disgust he raised his voice,
Not for vengeance but for the masses’ plight.
Determined he was to get equal status
For all, and destroy the racial apparatus.
Such triumph overseas exhibited his fortius.
Back in his motherland were the celebrations of this hero.
Raised expectations meant his onslaught on the colonial rule.
Being his own predicament no outlandish ruth,
Equipped he was with the weapons of righteousness and truth.
His patriotic speeches stirred the souls of Indians alive,
Feelings of nationalism in his words did thrive.
A heap of misdirected mob was India till now,
His leadership made this nation unite and take a vow.
He made them believe that Freedom could be near,
On their path they needed to choose the right gear.
A ray of light, a glimmer of hope was seen by the Indians,
His disobeyers were sent to social dungeons.
The 1st assault, Non-Cooperation crippled the British entity.
Unfortunately a few violent idiots spoiled the party.
But the man stuck to his principles of ethics and morality,
Even after a withdrawal there was no apathy.
He violated the law with no trepidation,
Dandi march and salt was made,
Reason he gave for his own captivation,
Civil disobedience was now inscription on jade.
For natives who took such gallant blows
But were never diverted from what had to be done,
One wrong step the Irwin pact left all undone.
But alarmed were the British by the national unity,
And that man who by now had become a prodigy.
A mellowing encounter, the divide and rule policy.
The struggle continued to the last go, Quit India.
Panicky government imprisons him to avoid insomnia.
Without him who showed them the way,
Unruly followers got violent in disarray.
Communalist Violence turned the country gray.
A depressed man lets the mission go to fray.
But his efforts by now had done enough,
For India had become a volcano ready to cough.
It took five years to achieve liberty, though
Selfish interests had divided his heart,
India and Pakistan were the two parts.
Father of the nation, greatest man to walk the arena,
None alive could match his persona.
Clad in a yard of cloth he changed the rules,
Unlike here he had little respect from the western fools.
For the great Nobel Prize didn’t have him in fate.
The sublime human had the most unfortunate end,
A maniac with three shots and he made his last bend.
Sixty one years now since the end of an epic of bravery,
Its worthless to say but he was “Mahatma Gandhi”.
This Fucking October
Its this time of the year when I am most spent,
Physically though, I never lose that mental intent.
But as they say its all in the mind,
Emptiness fucks me, My Company I can’t bind.
Its not just one dominion where I loose ground,
When demons come, from all sides they surround,
And lonely I stand facing these walls,
Therein lays the problem I can’t receive calls.
Everything then starts to go so wrong,
Even those which were a ball in the park,
My trusted senses become weak, even to a pet’s bark.
And I am not my usual self, audacious and strong.
When things need to be managed in a subtle manner,
My excited self fails like a miserable planner.
Those with the potential of being ones of a lifetime,
Turn out to be days that continue my misery rhyme.
Those buds that I longed for even without a ghost,
Fucked along with arrogance in times of a toast.
And made me wonder, as if I was the foolish one,
Or had I got under their skin, being the ignored one.
Again these days with the potential of a lifetime,
On Professional grounds I managed to mess.
I am plagued again, now a habit of mine,
Not firing when needed, like the untimely raw wine.
Resources I had gathered for a time too long,
An indispensable element for which I had to crave,
But as they say it’s the undeniable destiny’s song,
Grooves on his forehead, deciding course of the brave
Even my path’s determined by the lines on my palm,
And now its all in my hands but still not there.
So I stand here facing with coolness and calm,
What more in this fucking October I have to bare.
Physically though, I never lose that mental intent.
But as they say its all in the mind,
Emptiness fucks me, My Company I can’t bind.
Its not just one dominion where I loose ground,
When demons come, from all sides they surround,
And lonely I stand facing these walls,
Therein lays the problem I can’t receive calls.
Everything then starts to go so wrong,
Even those which were a ball in the park,
My trusted senses become weak, even to a pet’s bark.
And I am not my usual self, audacious and strong.
When things need to be managed in a subtle manner,
My excited self fails like a miserable planner.
Those with the potential of being ones of a lifetime,
Turn out to be days that continue my misery rhyme.
Those buds that I longed for even without a ghost,
Fucked along with arrogance in times of a toast.
And made me wonder, as if I was the foolish one,
Or had I got under their skin, being the ignored one.
Again these days with the potential of a lifetime,
On Professional grounds I managed to mess.
I am plagued again, now a habit of mine,
Not firing when needed, like the untimely raw wine.
Resources I had gathered for a time too long,
An indispensable element for which I had to crave,
But as they say it’s the undeniable destiny’s song,
Grooves on his forehead, deciding course of the brave
Even my path’s determined by the lines on my palm,
And now its all in my hands but still not there.
So I stand here facing with coolness and calm,
What more in this fucking October I have to bare.
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